Recently, I watched 35 and Ticking, the 2011 romantic comedy by Russ Parr. It starred Nicole Ari Parker, Meagan Good, Kevin Hart, Wendy Raquel Robinson and Tamala Jones. You can check out a clip here.
The movie centered around a group of thirty-something year old friends who were searching for love and meaning in their relationships. It showcased marriage, divorce, hook-ups and break-ups, but the thing that struck me most in the movie was the need to celebrate good men.
Wendy Raquel Robinson (best known as Tasha Mack on The Game) played Callise, an older woman who was always fussing and fighting to hold on to a piece of a cheating man. She routinely had embarrassing arguments with her mate because he just wouldn’t act right. Meanwhile, Coco (Jill Marie Jones) was the sister with a good man and in the movie, she ran the streets, slept around and totally disrespected her husband. Her husband was loyal, committed to his kids and willing to be there for his wife, but her actions continuously pushed him away. She never appreciated him and eventually they divorced.
Now, I know you are thinking, “That’s not me! I am good to my man. I love him.” But here’s a pop quiz: How often do you say “thank you” for the seemingly little things that he does without complaint, like taking out the trash, fixing things around the house and mowing the lawn? Do you take for granted the small things your man does to demonstrate his commitment to his family and running the household? Just some food for thought. Ask yourself this: How often do you acknowledge the big things in the relationship, like his faithfulness to the marriage and commitment to loving you? Have you grown to simply expect them or do you realize the blessing this represents?
Sometimes its easy to overlook the good things to instead focus on the negative. Do you nag when things don’t get done on your timetable or do you show appreciation to your husband for going to work everyday to pay the bills? Do you complain when he doesn’t do something the way that you would or do you simply appreciate him for being a faithful man who is committed to his marriage and his family?
It seems to me that people in good relationships sometimes forget that it doesn’t have to be that good. When you marry, you hope and pray for the best, but the reality is that some marriages aren’t as blissful as one would hope for. Some wives have to deal with husbands who run the streets or are absentee fathers or are totally irresponsible when it comes to caring for his family.
So, consider the 80/20 rule and if the good far outweighs the bad, zero in on the good and stop sweating the small stuff! Appreciate your man for having admirable character, for exhibiting love and for handling his family responsibilities. Who cares if he didn’t get around to your “honey do” list last Saturday or if he neglected to do something when you wanted it done? Ask yourself these questions that matter most: “Is he there for me?”; “Does he love me?”; and “Does he show it?”
If the answers are YES, stop sweating your husband and cut the man some slack…because remember, it doesn’t have to be that good.
I’d love to hear from you. Men – how does it make you feel when you woman appreciates you? Ladies, have you intentionally (or unintentionally become a nagger? If you’ve enjoyed this article, please “like” my page on Facebook by clicking here; follow me on Twitter @thelovejourney7 or sign up below to receive email notifications.
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Photos Courtesy of: madamenoire.com and newtimes.co.rw